Saturday

The hardest part was behind me, but today was still going to be very difficult. We got the girls up and dressed, and my Mother-in-law came over about 10am to pick them up for the day. I was very grateful to have this option available to us. Part of me was sad, that the girls weren't there for me to hug, and have around for more support. But the other part of me didn't want to have to try to wrestle a 4 year old, carry a 7 month old, keep track of a diaper bag and everything else involved with them during a very tough time. All in all I think it was best they weren't there. I had a couple of pictures of them with me though, in case I got the opportunity to show them off a bit.

I put on my suit, and my new purple tie, my beautiful bride had a purple top on that matched perfectly, and we headed to the church. Arriving a bit behind schedule, we walk in the back, and are directed to where the rest of my family is waiting. And by family, I mean my brothers, and their family, Patsy and her daughters, and their families, and finally my Aunt Ann. I was thrown for a loop. Ann is my Mom's only sibling. They haven't spoken since their Mom died, 15 years ago. Some long story that I cant even remember. She and her husband, just happened to be in Missouri this weekend for something completely unrelated. They live in Nevada. God surely does work in mysterious ways. My cousin Chris was there as well. I haven't seen him in at least 8 years. We chat for a bit, before Ben tells us that they are ready for the family to be seated.

We walk from our room in the back to the sanctuary, to the first couple of rows of seats. The church is full of people. I look at Mom's closed casket, and it is surrounded with even more flowers and plants than Friday Night. Pastor Todd reads a few verses for us from Psalms, and then they play a nice song that I don't even really hear from my own crying, and focusing on my family around me. The next song is "Somewhere over the rainbow", performed by my oldest niece. I know how hard that had to be for her. I went to a funeral earlier this year where the granddaughters all wrote something about their grandpa, and wanted to read them out loud. Only one out of the 5 made it through it. She did a fantastic job, breaking down near the end. That was Mom's favorite song. The next few songs were performed by a good friend of Mom and Dad, Steve, who played "You are my sunshine." Which was pretty tough for me. The words of that song have a whole different feeling now. After the music was finished, my oldest brother read Mom's obituary, and added a wonderful speech to the end about Mom. Pastor Todd finished the service, and everyone that attended was invited to proceed past the casket one more time.

Once everyone was done, it was just the family left. They opened Mom's casket one last time for us to say good bye. My brother put Mom's Russel-Stovers candy in her pocket. I put some pictures of my girls in there with her so she could have some pictures of her grand kids. She ALWAYS had pictures of her grand kids, and she always will. We said good-bye again.

The church was kind enough to make lunch for us. The service was at Noon, and the graveside wasn't until 4, but it was a 90 minute drive away. I got to visit with my cousin for a bit, and cracked a couple of jokes with people, about getting them more chips and salsa. My folks owned a Mexican restaurant for 13 years, where I waited tables almost every summer. So it was almost a habit for me to ask people if they wanted more chips and salsa ( don't ya hate inside jokes)

My beautiful bride and I headed for the Cemetery, we talked about all the people that were at the funeral, and how great it was to see them. We get to MG about 5 minutes before the rest of the family, and I show Mom's friend, Jackie, where Mom's mom is buried. I see so many people that I know it is over-whelming. Old high school friends, teachers, cousins, and close family friends. I am again reminded of how many people Mom knew and made an impact on. The rest of my family arrives and we follow the casket to the tent. We sit and listen to Pastor Todd talk about the circle of life, and the changing of the seasons.

Then we did some very "Un-funeral" like things... my mom had this tradition of bringing balloons to a funeral. She would pass them out, and then everyone would let them go. Then we watch them go up to heaven. Very moving, and very symbolic. So we passed around about 4 dozen balloons, and Dad let the first one go, followed by the rest of us. We watched them until we couldn't see them any more. About half way through their ascent, a very close friend from KC, Susie started ringing a cowbell, loudly! This is a tradition that stemmed back to my oldest brother playing football, Susie's husband was the coach. The team was the Cowboys, and any time the boys did something good, all the mom's would ring cowbells, ALL the moms... easily 10-15 of them. That cowbell was a tribute from Susie, and it made alot of sense to us, but everyone else looked a bit confused. Lastly, was an idea my oldest brother got from a funeral he attended a few months ago. We passed out sharpie markers, all different colors... and signed Mom's casket with notes and messages and pictures. All of the grand kids swarmed the casket, covering it with messages of love and tears. People wrote poems, and their favorite memories of Mom... it was something I had reservations about before it happened, but was completely behind once I saw what it did. Mom's entire casket was covered with messages from friends and family. Like I said, MG probably hasn't seen a graveside service like that. I had to explain the cowbell about 5 different times afterwards...but I didn't mind.

All of my Uncle Dwight's kids were there, it was really great to see them. I haven't seem them in many many years. Lots of old friends were there: My Boy Scout leader, my math teacher, my Spanish teacher, my High school counselor(a classmate of Mom's), lots of high school friends, not just mine, but Mom and Dad's. (My parents and I, all went to MG high school. Small town story, remember? Odd, but cool). Lots of hugs and talking afterwards. I got to show off my pictures of my girls. Just like Mom would do.

It was done. We all headed back to my parent's house, for dinner. The house was full of people sharing stories about Mom, and laughing with Dad. It was truly a party worthy of Linda Tate.

Goodbye Mom. I love you, I will miss you very much.